Have you got a Reality Check for a Hippie?

I am paralyzed by my lack of work and work experience. I also have no
Bachelor's of the Arts degree.
I lived off of my parents earnings. My father died, thank God, in 1992 and my mom graduated from this world in 2007.
Mom left me the home built in 1970.
So, I've been thinking of a home equity loan. Doesn't sound so cool as that Reality Check they had a while back, and I'm sorry we never got to take advantage of that. I guess mom was concerned about interest and paying it back.
Student loans are great. The Stafford Loan I got when I went to school to study information technology had a low interest and I was surprised at how many years I would have been allowed to spread the payments. Unfortunately, I lived in a kind of dream world with my mom. If Billy had been here like he was before he married or if a woman had been able to tolerate my moods, the low ones in particular, maybe I would have spread that loan out over many years. I just didn't think about money.
Now, I'm afraid.
I don't know what right they have to deprive me of work. They say it's the economy and my lack of work experience. Funny the one job I had the supervisor called it a dead end job. I thought it was kind of nice but there was no promotions and no raises in pay since it was connected to financial aid. It wasn't really a dead end job but I think people should be protected who are in those dead end job situations. Still I would like a well paying job, with benefits and retirement.
Maybe my interest in Siddha Yoga turned one employer off. He was looking out for employees who take a job and then decide to go back to school. I wanted to be a swami once. I wonder if that was what made him say no to giving me the job.
So, to get back to my point. I was talking with my sister-in-law who works in a credit union giving car loans. She said I couldn't get a home equity loan without a job.
That seems queer to me first of all because I checked it out on the web and it said I could get a home equity loan. I was totally honest with the online form indicating that I was not employed. I have gotten my fair share of credit cards without employment, too, though there have been some who would not give me a card because I do not work.
That was the situation at Prosper.com. I had a large credit card debt and I was waiting for the court to dissolve a trust and give me what my mother intended that I have. Prosper wouldn't give me a loan. Some who contacted me by e-mail asked how did I expect to pay the loan back if I didn't have a job.
I didn't notice any finance charges on my credit card. I was worried about the APR.
There had been one charge of some size but I kept a lookout for more. I couldn't get much information from the credit card company, at that time, Fleet Credit, which was associated with the Working Assets credit card.
So, I don't trust Prosper anymore.
I'm concerned about when I have to pay back.
I want to sell my house but I would like to make some improvements, maybe move out before I do. There is a lot of sentimental value but I'm between a rock and a hard place now.